January is a great month to consider what our lives are all about, which is why we have such a love-hate relationship with New Years resolutions. We love setting ourselves new goals and then generally feel depressed when we fail to live up to them! I was recently at a dinner at which someone told me that in Russia they don't tend to in the introductory phase of a relationship ask what people do, but rather ask the question "what is your life all about"?
What an intriguing question!
If we ask ourselves what our life is all about what answers do we get? When I asked myself this question, the answer seemed deceptively simple- supporting my family, having a great marriage, making a contribution and leaving a legacy. Fleshing out what these actually mean is rather like shading in a picture once you have drawn some kind of outline.
How can I best support the family? What would enable me to have a great marriage? What sort of contribution to the world can I make this year? What legacy would I like to leave?
The answers to these questions take my thinking (and following the same process I am suggesting also yours) to a new level and lead me to be more intentional about how I spend my time (which is after-all my and your most precious resource)
So instead of feeling depressed over New Year's resolutions that didn't quite pan out as you had hoped, why not consider what your life is all about and ask yourself some different questions. Perhaps living life on purpose is qualiatively more satisfying in the long run and certainly makes for a more interesting introductory conversation!
Great questions Tania. Like you, my life is mainly about supporting my family and honing the legacy I shall leave when I shuffle off this mortal coil! Perhaps as I am a bit (!) older, in the main, my sons and daughter need a different kind of support, but even so in their ever changing lives high on my list is how can I love them well. I enjoy such a lovely marriage with Alan because I learned how, and I want to spread that as far and wide as possible. I shall be launching my online Relationship Academy and new Relationship Coaching Diploma this year, and am grappling with all the technical challenges that brings. These wonderful embryonic businesses of ours need a little help from our friends so please go to my Relationship Academy: Lessons They Didn't Teach In School page and "Like" It:)
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Thanks for this Grace. On a steep learning curve! Really looking forward to your advanced mentoring day that you are doing for the ECFT in March. You are right about all our relationships they need to be intentional as well x
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